Firearms of Steel, Halberd of Iron!
by artisanrox
Summary: Who could have known that an innocent pat on the back could develop into...this? BankotsuRenkotsu. No, really.
1. Chapter 1

Authoress' note: BankotsuRenkotsu is One True Pairing!

Just kidding.

Wow, this fic was painful to write. As you can tell from the rest of my fanfic, I'm not a BankotsuJakotsu shipper. I see only a comeraderie there, maybe even a fatherly comeraderie between Bankotsu and his brethren-in-arms.

So I wrote this fic, because, yanno, two dudes can't be within ten feet of one another without "something more" going on. And ALL fangirls like yaoi and yuri. Mmm-hmm.

Obligatory warnings:This fic contains HEAVY out-of-character shounen-ai themes and sort-of Mpreg. If you don't like that stuff or don't understand what "parody" means, please hit the back button now. If you _aren't _crazy about that stuff and you _do_ know what "parody" means, this might be the fic just for you!

I also won't be held responsible for weird spacing as the interface on ff dot net seems to love taking my spaces out here and there. I can't fixone thing without something else getting messed up.

I also have to do the disclaimer thing and say I don't own Inuyasha or anything in the Inuyasha universe!

**Firearms of Steel, Halberd of Iron!**

CHAPTER ONE.

Renkotsu knew there would be hell to pay. The jewel shard seared in his shoulder, causing him to feel even more guilt and frantic worry with every step forward.

The kid, who was his leader, was naive. He was so often stupidly naive. Renkotsu recalled how many times he himself had to come up with the simplest attack strategies as to ensure the highest number of kills to the opponent's side, rather than walking up to the front door and knocking, as Bankotsu often was wont to do. Bankotsu's simplistic values and methods often sparked rage within him, rage that had never been with him before his resurrection. All his life, he had had to think his way out of every situation he'd gotten himself into, and the kid never had to do that, for the simply fact that he was _so_ strong.

Only now, with a second chance at things, had he regretted his lack of forethought in joining the merciless group of mercenaries known as the Seven Man Army.

Not that he regretted attacking, outwitting, and annihilating the opponents. No.

He regretted all the things made available to him through his stay in the Seven Man Army. Jewels, riches, fine silks, spectacular weaponry...

...and Shikon Jewel shards.

They were a distraction to him, and he knew it. Anything that had the intoxicating perfume of power fascinated him, and the shards of the broken Jewel were no different.

He wanted them all.

And now, he had secreted away one of them. It was the shard practically given him by his dearest comrade, Ginkotsu, in spite of orders given by their leader to hand them over if any of their plunders would deem successful, or their comrades would fall. Renkotsu knew there would be only one of them remaining when their leader, that damned bastard of a kid, Bankotsu, found out about Ginkotsu's shard; and that person would be none other than himself. Renkotsu swore to himelf that he would live to posess all of them. Yes, he had onced looked up to, admired, even_ loved _his Eldest Brother. But affections lessen with time. Familiarity breeds contempt, and you always hurt the ones you love. So it was time to spread his wings, and assure himself of more power, and more glory.

Anything, as long as it was _more_.

The firearms expert knew that now, it was all too late. Travelling in the stream that led from the cave where that miserable wolf-demon was carried, Renkotsu's brow was furrowed deeply, and his jaw was locked so tensely it provided a distraction from the chill of the stream water. All he could think was that his dearest comrade's shard was used not only in spite of, but _to_ spite Bankotsu, and Renkotsu sweated as he tried to think of a strategy to render himself the owner of all nine shards which came into his comrades' possession.

_If Bankotsu finds out that I'm using the Shikon fragment, he will kill me...What can I possibly do now? _There was no way for Renkotsu to think his way out this time, and he knew it.

As the chill of the cold water bit his heels, as his feet splashed through the stream, a call of his name interrupted his scheming thoughts, shocking him into looking up.

"Hey there, Renkotsu!"

Renkotsu looked up, and startled a bit. His leader's dark gaze bore down on him from above, as Bankotsu stood on the riverbank. However, he noticed something uncomfortably odd about Bankotsu's greeting, despite his now severe expression. His eyes narrowed the slightest degree, and worry was etched in his brow.

He _knew._ "B...Bankotsu...my Eldest Brother...," he said hesitatingly, exiting the stream and standing next to his leader.

"I heard from the insects that Ginkotsu has died. Right?"

Renkotsu couldn't keep his voice from stammering nervously. "Ah...Y...Yeah." _He already knows about me!_

His expectations of the Banryuu running him through at that moment were unnervingly proved false. Did Renkotsu sense something strange in that call of greeting his Eldest Brother had given him?

"That's too bad..."

And with that, his leader's face became downcast, and he spun round on a heel. Renkotsu had to back away from Bankotsu as he turned around, or the huge banryuu would have smacked him hard upside the head.

"You worked so hard. But Ginkotsu sure got 'remodeled', didn't he?" asked Bankotsu, walking a short distance away.

Renkotsu stood still as a statue. He could not comprehend why Bankotsu's dark humor would show now, out of all times. Didn't those annoying insects tell him anything? Was he ready to have people in stitches as he cleaved them in half? Was he trying to one-up Jerry Seinfeld, or Jeff Foxworthy?

Bankotsu turned back around, and Renkotsu would have been instantly ready with his hand-made rifle, had he not seen the disconcerting..._smile_...on Bankotsu's face.

"But I'm glad, Renkotsu. At least you are still alive," he said quietly, and at that point, Renkotsu was totally befuddled. Renkotsu was rarely befuddled, and he was painfully aware how much this gave his leader the mental advantage.

But that's always what infuriated Renkotsu so much. Such a simplistic kid...and he _still_ always had the advantage.

"Suikotsu has also died," said Bankotsu in a most sombre tone again, hearing the gossip from the demonic insects buzzing around his head. "It's just the three of us left. All there is of the Seven Man Army is you, me, and Jakotsu."

Renkotsu gasped. Bankotsu made a move toward him.

Renkotsu's hand inched toward the trigger on his weapon.

Bankotsu reached up, and Renkotsu tensed, waiting for the Banryuu to cleave him in half. He was sure Bankotsu could smell the fear on him.

And then, the unexpected happened.

Bankotsu did something strange.

He..._patted_ Renkotsu.

And on the back, yet!

"Well, that's how it is," said Bankotsu encouragingly, warmly. "I'll be relying on you even more from now on."

Renkotsu's mind raced. He was starting to understand that strange feeling he sensed when Bankotsu said "hello" to him before. But logic, social expectations, and experience did not match what he felt. Also, since they were resurrected, he had not the opportunity to spend any quality time with Bankotsu, and that allowed unresolved tension to build. Being separated from him so much gave him inadequate information on which to base his analysis of Bankotsu's greeting.

However, he could not deny what he felt.

_How did he know that I always regarded being patted on the back as...erotic? He seems to know that the best way to get me all buttered up is to pat me on the back!_

Renkotsu was taken aback. _Bankotsu...is...**attracted to me**? He is returning my secret, unrequited longing for him I've had for all this time? Could this possibly be what Naraku's insects have told him? And his brow was furrowed in anger for not having known sooner? Was I wrong in plotting against him?_

Usually, as Renkotsu knew, at this point in either the manga, the anime, or the fanfiction, the background behind him would turn green and happy and bubbly. But Renkotsu _would not_ allow the background behind him to turn green and happy and bubbly. That was a crude, simplistic technical device. A device used by those who could not render completely the complicated thoughts racing through Renkotsu's mind.

_That bastard hasn't noticed about Ginkotsu's fragment?_

Renkotsu was perplexed for the first time in his life, or afterlife.

_Instead of running me through with the Banryuu..he's..**hitting on me**? Absolutely ridiculous! Well...at any rate, it seems I'm still useful. So I'll get to live longer._ Renkotsu turned away, and began to walk toward the castle that the Seven Man Army had taken from the traitorous daimyo days ago.

"Renkotsu!"

"Yes?"

Bankotsu heartily slapped Renkotsu on the back. "We need to wrap it up for today. I'll walk back to the castle with ya."

_So, he likes to play rough, too! My defenses are...weakening!_

* * *

After an unsuccessful day or so of looking for the half-demon, Renkotsu could not get the amorous pat-on-the-back Bankotsu had given him out of his mind. The new day made the flame in his heart grow brighter. 

"Big Brother..." he ventured, when the two of them were at the mountain, trying to flush out the half-demon.

"Yeah?"

Renkotsu stumbled for words. He had played his part well all along, and now was the time to bare his soul to his leader. "Don't you...sense something...about us?"

Walking alongside of him, Bankotsu's face turned to complete puzzlement. "Huh?"

Renkotsu halted their progress for a moment. "Bankotsu..."

"Yeah?"

"I..." Renkotsu trailed off, unsure as to whether he should press on. However, his thoughts turned to that undeniable act of lust, that pleading gesture to know one another as no one else knows one another...ah, yes, a simple pat-on-the-back, but with an ocean's depth of meaning. He mustered up the courage to continue, keeping that simple gesture in his mind, since it provided so much hope. "I always found you unbearably attractive."

Bankotsu stood there, halberd in hand, and paled. He raised his eyebrows briefly.

Renkotsu took an incredible risk. He knew all his dreams of love, acceptance, and the potential future of children with Bankotsu could be shattered moments from now.

After a darned long while, Bankotsu's expression turned to exultation. "That's great!" he said, gripping Renkotsu around the shoulders with a strong arm. It made Renkotsu breathe a sigh of relief. Bankotsu had, in fact, returned his long-hidden affections! He had read the greeting and the pat-on-the-back correctly!

"I've got a confession too," said the young man. "I've always thought bald is beautiful."

Renkotsu turned away coyly. "Just..._beautiful_?"

Bankotsu laughed, and threw the Banryuu's cruel double-edged blade down into the ground. Using the arm already around his comrade to turn him back around, he brought up the other arm around him. "No, Renkotsu. Really, _really_...beautiful. You're _stunning_, man."

Renkotsu was relieved. He had always thought himself inferior to Bankotsu because of the younger man's thick mane of hair. "I...never told you. Because..."

"Don't worry, Renkotsu." Bankotsu batted his eyelashes at him, and began to suggestively undo his braid. "And forget what I said about going to the castle. I wanna trade some hot war stories with you. Right here. Right now." He tore off his armor in a mad fury, and almost ripped the material of his handguards, tossing the items he removed from his person far away. "Ya know all those times I called Jakotsu 'weird'? I was just kidding!"

"I know that, Big Brother," said Renkotsu, finally having had enough encouragement, began to take his own armor off. "I'm sure everyone will take in jest that time I threatened to pull Jakotsu's tongue out, for insinuating I was attracted to that half-demon!"

Bankotsu was working on getting his shinguards off, and found that it was kind of annoying hopping around on one foot. Renkotsu saw Bankotsu's convoluted efforts to remove the guards as quickly as possible, so he offered an arm for Bankotsu to lean on.

"Yanno what, Renkotsu? Everyone that had lived to see all of us for more than ten minutes thought I had something going on with Jakotsu. Or, the _really really _small, minority who might think I like women. But man, they're all wrong!"

Renkotsu smiled. This was such a cleansing experience for both of them.

"I was way too nice to him when he kept on arguing that he wanted to kill that half-demon. I mean, that should've clued everyone in right there! The truth is, I use the banryuu, or threaten to use it, only on my worst enemies," and he winked at the firearms expert, "and my _best friends_."

Whether the background turned green and happy and bubbly wasn't the issue to Bankotsu. True confessions were the priority here. "It was _you_, Renkotsu," the young man continued. "_You_ were the one I always thought about. _You_ were the one I wanted to have babies with!"

Renkotsu nodded. "Yes, even though we are a group of merciless killers who, in turn, could be killed any day," he said, rubbing his chin, "I think we need the patter of little feet to brighten up our mood. Killing villagers, destroying castles and putting heads on pikes really gets monotonous after a while. It's about time we all celebrate the incomparable joy that a new life brings."

Renkotsu had a little thrill go up and down his spine, now that he had the freedom to say those words. He thought how ironic it all was. He thought how perfect his life was now, how complete he felt, and how so irresistibly in love he was. And it was all due to an innocent pat-on-the-back!

Bankotsu threw away his shirt, and leaned way in to Renkotsu. "Looks like we're on the same page, here," he said suggestively. "That's what I love about you, Renkotsu. Completely logical, but thrilled by trying all sorts of new stuff, and happy with the thought of future kids, even with someone you can't possibly have kids _with_!" Bankotsu paused, overcome with emotion. "You'll be a _great _dad!" Bankotsu exclaimed. "I'm so happy anything is possible in fanfiction!"

Grinning evilly, Renkotsu reached in his shirt pocket, and brought out a small tub, which, Renkotsu noted, contained Aloe Vera gel.

Bankotsu fluffed his luxurious hair teasingly, then proceeded impatiently to take his trousers off. "That's my man, Renkotsu," said Bankotsu with an intoxicatingly charming smile. "You're always prepared!"


	2. Chapter 2

Authoress' note: I still don't own Inuyasha or anything in the Inuyasha universe.

Once again: This fic contains HEAVY out-of-character shounen-ai themes and sort-of Mpreg. If you don't like that stuff or don't understand what "parody" means, please hit the back button now. If you _aren't _crazy about that stuff and you_do_ know what "parody" means, this might be the fic just for you!

I also won't be held responsible for weird spacing as the interface on ff dot net seems to love taking my spaces out here and there. I can't fixone thing without something else getting messed up.

4/26/06--fixed a couple things.

**Firearms of Steel, Halberd of Iron!**

CHAPTER TWO.

Bankotsu and Renkotsu smiled to themselves, each watching the sunset as they sat side-by-side on the steps to their base, which they had finally reached about an hour ago.

Renkotsu recalled how he and his fearless leader had given one another offensive and defensive pointers on their way here. And Renkotsu delved into the endless advantages of daily moisturiziation with aloe vera gel--since they were, ya know, _using_ it and everything. It was all so unusually impulsive for Renkotsu, but nonetheless, it was worthwhile, and he'd do it all over again had he had the chance. Because he was so in love, and without that pat-on-the-back, this would not have been at all possible!

Renkotsu smiled. He thought it annoying that he and Bankotsu should have argued so much at first as to who should be on top, but, nonetheless, they settled their differences, and agreed that each should have their own chance at playing leader.

And now, Bankotsu was sitting aside him. Basking in the afterglow of their newfound ardor, Renkotsu noticed that his lover looked positively ravishing in the evening light.

"Big Brother?"

Bankotsu turned his head towards his lover, and placed a hand on his knee. "Yeah?"

"I've been feeling nauseous in the past few moments."

Bankotsu raised an eyebrow. "So?"

Renkotsu looked back at him cautiously. He wanted to break this to Bankotsu slowly so as not to have his heart burst from happiness.

"So? Didja catch somethin'?"

"No," said Renkotsu excitedly, although as demurely as possible, as he was still trying to discover Bankotsu's family values. He cleared his throat. "We...we should consider some names for our offspring."

"You're..._pregnant_?" asked Bankotsu, turning white as a sheet.

"I do believe I am, even though it's a physical imposs-"

Renkotsu was cut off from breathing by an intensely painful bear-hug by Bankotsu.

"Oh, my God! That's so great! I'm so happy!" tearfully said Bankotsu, while maintaining a vise-like grip on Renkotsu's torso.

Sure he was feeling his ribs breaking, he tried to get the attention of the young man. "Big...Brother...," Renkotsu said, squeezing every syllable out, trying to be heard, "I...can't...breathe..."

Bankotsu let go of the firearms expert, and Renkotsu breathed in heavily, gasping for air while clutching his chest, relieved to be able to use his lungs again. Bankotsu gave a multitude of apologies to Renkotsu.

The firearms expert grinned while reoxygenating his body. Bankotsu truly didn't know his own strength sometimes...but that's one thing that made him so attractive to Renkotsu in the past!

"That's so great, " Bankotsu continued, wiping a tear from his eyes. "Wow, in record time too! That's pretty fast even for an Mpreg fic!" The young man's shoulders fell a bit. "Though I really wanted to be the one to get pregnant, yanno, being the one with the long hair and all," he said, looking up at the firearms expert's ever-so-slightly-miffed face, "but pregnancy is never a predictible thing." Bankotsu made a fist and raised it in victory. "But I shouldn't be surprised!" He crossed his arms defiantly, and raised an eyebrow, proud as a peacock. "I'd like to think I have the strongest swimmers in Japan!"

Renkotsu smiled. Only he was privy to the fact that were more parts of Bankotsu's anatomy that were as strong as his swimmers. "About the names, Big Brother..."

Bankotsu thought for a while, but shook his head. "Renkotsu, I'm not good with names. I think you should handle that."

Renkotsu humphed amusedly. Bankotsu was never good with details. "Maybe you can suggest a _general _idea as to where we should start looking?"

"Well...it would be great to name 'em after the men we lost," Bankotsu reconsidered, smiling and stroking his chin with a finger in thought.

Renkotsu startled a bit. "What if we have girls, Big Brother?"

Bankotsu laughed, and lightly punched his lover in the shoulder, which translated into almost knocking him off the steps. "You always think of everything," he said. He stretched his arms behind his head, leaned back, and balanced a leg on his opposite knee. He lazily swung the top leg for a few thoughtful seconds. "Ah," he said, waving a hand, "we'll just give 'em back and get a refund. So we have to make sure we keep our receipts."

Renkotsu's eyes went even wider than before. "But...!"

No sooner had he heard Bankotsu's answer when Jakotsu came walking up to them.

"Bankotsu! Big Brother!" said Jakotsu, in answer to Bankotsu's warm hello and wave.

A twinge of jealousy ran through Renkotsu. _So many fangirls have it all wrong! Bankotsu and I truly are the ones who belong together! This one here_, he thought, glaring at Jakotsu,_ never had anything to do with him!_

"I still haven't seen Inuyasha around," reported Jakotsu sadly. Downcast, he sat to the opposite side of Bankotsu as his other comrade. "I really want those ears," he said dreamily, while gazing off into the horizon. "They'd look so good next to my wolf-tail and my monk's staff when I get a hold of them!"

Bankotsu hmmed in the most non-partisan way he could.

Jakotsu noticed that he was not his usual self; he was way too disinterested in his report, and it worried him.

Bankotsu brightened, and flashed an engaging grin toward his comrade. "Hey, Jakotsu! I need your opinion on something," said Bankotsu to Jakotsu after a short silence.

Jakotsu looked at his leader, stunned. "What do you need _my_ opinion for?"

"I wanna know what you think Renkotsu here and I should name our kids."

Jakotsu almost fell over dead right there. Never had he heard such ridiculous tripe from his fearless leader. He blinked a few times, but that didn't change the situation. It wasn't a bad dream, and he didn't end up waking up.

"..._Excuse_ me?" It was the most polite thing Jakotsu had _ever_ said in his entire life. He immediately wanted to have all his comrades beside him again, just so they all could unload every single ounce of firepower owned by the Seven Man Army on the authoress.

_I'm always proven right that women are positively FILTHY!_, thought Jakotsu, scowling at the authoress.

Jakotsu's vengeful thoughts were interrupted by Bankotsu's continuation of his saccarine-laden ramblings. "Renkotsu and I. We're gonna have a baby together! We hit the sack on the way here, and Renkotsu's pregnant."

Jakotsu wanted to gag himself as he transferred his attention to Renkotsu. And he was appalled at Renkotsu's calm, frighteningly uncharacteristic smile. It was the creepiest darn thing he'd ever seen.

"You know, Jakotsu," said Bankotsu, in a fatherly tone, "there comes a time in every man's life when he thinks of bigger and better things. When he's tired of the way things are, and wants to cut himself a new break. When he gathers together the broken pieces of experience life has handed him, and strives to create a new image of himself, where those broken pieces form a beautiful-"

"-I _get it_, Big Brother," said Jakotsu menacingly. This was definitely a terribly written Bankotsu. Flowery language was usually Renkotsu's business.

Bankotsu nervously messed with the ties on his gloves. "I'm saying that I wanna quit being a mercenary and run away with Renkotsu, so we can have lots of babies together."

Jakotsu glanced over to Renkotsu. "Renkotsu, my brother, tell me this is a joke. Back me up here."

Renkotsu still had the same disturbing, serene smile on his face. "Jakotsu, we will name a child after you if you'd like."

Bankotsu nudged his lover's arm, and winked at him. "And you're not even half done finding out all _my_ kinks yet!"

"Big Brother, I'm sure that you're the kinkiest one out of us all!"

And with that, the two of them burst into laughter.

Jakotsu couldn't help himself. Standing up, he began to throw a tantrum on the steps, but lost his balance in disorientation, tumbled over himself, and landed at the bottom of the stairs. He righted himself with his eyes squeezed shut and his jaw clenched, clutching his head in agony as he sat in the dirt. OK, so he wasn't the strongest, the smartest, the most vicious, the most versatile, but, goddamnit, _he was the kinkiest_! How dare his Big Brother trump him in that department!

"Bankotsu! Big Brother! My brother Renkotsu! This is not right!" he exclaimed.

He glared at the both of them. Bankotsu wanted to quit the team and Renkotsu wasn't a heartless bastard anymore! What could he possibly do?

Still sitting in a heap on the ground, Jakotsu realized that the Seven Man Army was the victim of another awful fangirl plot device. He let go of his head, and his shoulders slumped resignedly. He clucked his tongue and sighed. _First it was all those awful Mary Sues, and now this! It's now this this "plot?-what-plot?" crap!_

Jakotsu shook his head, and got up to his feet. He trudged over to where his two comrades were sitting, and once again, sat down next to Bankotsu, a concerned gleam in his eyes. What was wrong with the two of them?

He glanced down at Bankotsu's right wrist. Maybe the answer was there!

"Bankotsu?"

"Yeah?" said Bankotsu, "Got any ideas for names yet?" he asked, hopeful.

Jakotsu rolled his eyes. He'd have to do this the hard way.

"Bankotsu, can I see your palm?"

"Why?"

Jakotsu turned down a corner of his mouth wryly. "I've been trying to learn palm reading," he lied. "I, uh, want to tell the futures of you and the...new..." Jakotsu couldn't decide whether to say "mother" or "father". Figuring the filth that women are, and not wanting to insult Renkotsu, he finally decided on "father" as he glanced over to him.

Renkotsu shyly touched his fingertips to his mouth and looked away.

_This is getting more frightening by the second!_ thought Jakotsu, sticking his tongue out in disgust.

"Great!" said Bankotsu, holding out his right palm to Jakotsu. "I wanna know if he'll be strong like me, or smart like Renkotsu! Because, yanno, if he's none of that, we're gonna have to trade him in, too."

Renkotsu rolled his eyes. "Bankotsu...think of the _children_!"

Jakotsu took hold of Bankotsu's wrist. "I'm so sorry, Big Brother," he said sadly. And with that, he viciously dug his fingernails into Bankotsu's wrist.

The unexpected pain caused Bankotsu to cry out, and try to pull his arm back. He leaned over and had to support himself with a hand on the steps. "Jakotsu! Wh-- what the hell are you doing?" he hissed through clenched jaw, squeezing his eyes shut from the pain.

Renkostu humphed jealously, looked away from them, and crossed his arms while listening to Bankotsu's gasping and whimpering. _This the kind of thing that the fangirls _usually _go for! But they are still...wrong!_

Jakotsu dug around a bit, to Bankotsu's extreme discomfort. Finding what he wanted, he ripped something out.

It was Suikotsu's jewel shard, which he had given to Bankotsu the previous day.

And the shard still had a twinge of bright purple to it!

Jakotsu lowered his brow. As he observed the shard, a bead or two of Bankotsu's blood fell from the shard to the floor. "Just what I suspected. It's still-" Jakotsu thought he was going to get sick all over the steps, "-_pure_," he spat out.

Grasping his wrist against the pain, Bankotsu shut one eye. "The hell does that mean?"

"It was affecting you horribly, Big Brother! It was making you into some kind of gooey, twisted..._fluffbunny_!"

"Huh," said Bankotsu, still gripping his arm. "Makes sense."

Jakotsu looked a bit relieved. It seems that Bankotsu's head was getting clear, now that the awful pureness of Suikotsu's shard was removed from him.

He had to think of a way to make the shard impure, and since "impurity" was Jakotsu's middle name, or last name if you like, it didn't take long.

He held the shard in his palm, and thought up vivid mental pictures of all the things he'd love to do and say to Inuyasha if only Bankotsu would allow him to kill the half-demon. It made him so excited, and he made all sorts of happy noises thinking about it. He wished so, so badly that the background would turn green and happy and bubbly, but since Inuyasha is the good guy, even more so the Title Character, the Powers That Be deemed it inappropriate. In spite of all the red tape, tears still poured out from his eyes, and they rolled down his face. They splashed onto the jewel shard in his palms. The shard responded to Jakotsu's outpouring of emotion by turning dark again.

Jakotsu grasped Bankotsu's wrist again, and slipped the shard back in. Bankotsu once again had to flinch against the pain of inserting it, but the shard completely healed his wound, and in no time, he was back to normal.

Bankotsu flexed his hand. "Damn, I don't remember much of what happened in the past few hours, except that it sucked."

_Our passionate, blissful time together was not to his liking? _thought Renkotsu. _Was I too rough? Or not rough enough? We...we desperately need to talk this out!_

"Your jewel shard was intolerably pure, Big Brother! It was affecting your thinking!"

He turned to Jakotsu, and breathed a sigh of relief. "I sure owe you another one!" he said, giving him another of his strong slaps on the back. "You're the best."

Jakotsu smiled. "It's so nice to have you back, Big Brother." He pouted adorably. "Now may I go kill Inuyasha?"

Bankotsu's eyes shifted to their corners, and Renkotsu could see him glaring in irritation. "_No_, Jakotsu. I told you a thousand times that he's mine."

Jakotsu's shoulders fell again. Unfortunately, Bankotsu _was_ back to normal.

Jakotsu perked up. "Big Brother! What about _him_? Renkotsu, my brother, you haven't been feeling well, either!"

Renkotsu gulped in terror.

Bankotsu caught on. He put one hand on a hip, and leaned over, with his brow raised. "Huh...I wonder if he's got a crappy shard, too."

Jakotsu glared at Renkotsu, who had a look of sheer terror on his face Especially when Jakotsu licked his lips suggestively.

Renkotsu gulped, wide eyed. His forehead became damp with perspiration. He knew he'd have a lot of explaining to do.

_They'll either find out about Ginkotsu's shard...or they'll find that both of my shards are completely impure and I was serious!_

_What do I do **now**?_

The End!


End file.
